After spending my afternoon with baby, we finally get to speak up on things that we do towards each other. For me, he thinks that i'm controlling him. Maybe to me I'm not controlling him but maybe for him I am. He told me that he doesn't like to be control by other people. So let's be it okay? I won't control you anymore and I wont ask you who you are going out with, what time coming home all that. I don't want to be known as a 'controller' in your life. I swear I don't want. Trust me. Yes,i do give you permission to control me. But as always, your privileges are limited. You can only control me for my habits of smoking but not other things. It's gonna be fair and square. Okay?
Like i've always wrote in my blog,I'm weak in all this stuff. I don't have the skills to do it. Sometime i just feel like giving up in everything and just go with my own business and own flow. We've talked a lot just now and we talked about school life and more. I just totally envy you,understand? I know after the incident, i've not been giving you much much attention and we only meet up like only two days in a week and I don't even get to spend time with you like we use to when we first met. I didn't plan this in my relationship and yours. I know that i'm not giving you the fullest max love to you. I haven't love you enough yet. I can see that i don't really get a lot too but i understand your life preety much. I'm trying to be understanding here,can't you see?
Yes,so from now onwards I'm gonna stop asking you too much question cause imma afraid if you really get annoyed with me so much. So the question that i'm gonna ask is ' Where are you going?' "Okay,takecare and have fun." I'm not gonna ask you too much questions like "Who areyou going with?" What time all that i won't be asking you anymore. I'll try my best to get rid of all that questions. I promise to do my best. But, when it comes to an conclusions, please don't think that i don't care about you anymore. I don't want to ask you such question cause I respect you. I will never regret doing this because i don't want to ruin all this love just because of a small thing. From now on, with effect from 1/10/10 , I won't stop you from doing anything. Anything you want to do, just go ahead. I'm okay with it. But remember,if you push it to the limit, the perfect answer to your wrongdoings is just this five words. I want to _______________. Okay? I really hope you understand what i'm going through right now.
Have a save night, iloveyou Kurniawan Adeyanto <3
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